Friday, September 14, 2012


Watching you… watching me… I wonder, what do you see? Am I everything you thought I would be? All perceptions are a projection of our own happy little version of reality… of life… you see me one way…. Yet I see me another… through which looking glass is best? Through which one is true?

As I speak in metaphors only those who know me can see right through….

I need a deep breath. A moment of silence… a moment of solace… a way to push all the jumbled thoughts in my head out – and take them all back in, slowly – in their proper order, with the right priorities assigned to each one… But I have no way of doing that right now… I have no outlet… I can almost steal a moment, when I step outside… and take in the oddly warm late fall air… as the smell of dirt and fallen leaves fills the rain moistened space around me. But what does it get me? Where does it lead me? Just deeper into my overworked mind I am afraid…

Perhaps I am just tired… a sound night's sleep has not been mine in all too long… But I have grown used to that – sleeping well has not been a friend to me in what seems like years, and probably is, years.

Hello again cliff… my dear friend… challenger of my wits and all that… I took my leap, yet nothings happened. No wings were sprouted… no bridge to the other side found… yet, I did not crash into your jagged edges either. It seems my fate remains undecided… free falling – waiting on an outcome. It is too late to turn back now… and I would not choose to, even if I could… everything in life worth doing, has risk, after-all. Yet I packed no parachute… and I would truly love a hint, at how it all ends…

Not all who wander… are lost. (J.R.R. Tolkien)

Posted Date: : Nov 29, 2008 5:46 PM

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