....

My husband has been asking me what's bothering me today. And I told him... it just seems pointless right now to keep hashing back into it.

When he cheated on me the first time, I got angry... enraged, plus hurt. This time I just feel hurt. Sure... I am mad... but I am much more hurt this time. And I have not even had time to really cry about it or anything. I feel like I am bottling it all up inside... and it hurts.

But what am I going to do? Tell him I am hurting... ok, he knows that - what else? I have no idea. I just feel so lost in some aspects of my life. I have felt very close to my husband at times the past week... but still I am hurting so bad too... I can't even describe it.

I thought maybe coming here and getting my thoughts out would help... but I am just running into a brick wall here too. I just want to cry. I have such a knot in my stomach.

01.30.2004
3:11 p.m.