Friday, September 7, 2012

Help for me...?

It looks dreary and nasty out. But I love days like this. The colors of the leaves seem so much brighter against a gray sky, than a blue one.

I have done *nothing* in my house. And there is so much I need to do... I hate this. In a little while I will get up and go spackle the spots on the wall in the new baby's room, so hopefully tonight they will be dry for my husband to sand.

But then what? I could list off literally a hundred more things I want to do... but I just don't have the time to do them. My husband had suggested bringing my little brother up here to help out... and the more I think about it, the more I think it really is a good idea... but of course, with everything there is some sort of complication. He could not come until after November 15th, meaning, he would probably be here when the new baby arrives. To me, that is fine. Frankly, I think he would then become REALLY useful in lending me a hand while I recover and have stitches in *unmentionable* places and need to chase after my continuously energetic increasingly curious one year old baby girl. But it is a problem for others. My mother-in-law is not comfortable with him staying with her the 2 or 3 days I'm in the hospital, and my husband has hinted he is not comfortable with him staying alone at my house. (My husband will be staying at my mother-in-laws with my daughter because it's 50 miles closer to the hospital I'm delivering at.) So what do I do? I had this offer of "help" dangled in front of me... and now - it can't happen after all?

I been giving it some thought, and my brother would even make letting the dog out while no one is home easier... I would be devastated if a neighbor forgot or something and he crapped or something on the new carpet. I don't know... I guess it remains to be seen. And of course, true to form, I can't even get in touch with my little brother today to ask him if *he* would be comfortable staying in my home alone for the 2 or 3 days I'd be in the hospital, because my mother's phone has been shut off. I am sure I will hear from them somehow within the week though.

Having help around would be so nice for a little while. And right now I think my husband is not sure where he "stands" on how and what I *should* be doing. One day he is telling me I should be taking it easy... and lets get help up here, etc. and so on... and the next he is *hinting* he misses the days that I made the bed every day (I've not been doing it recently because it's a pain in the ass because of where the crib is I'd have to be a damn gymnast to tuck one side of the blanket down so it looks good...) and that I can just clean the den, do the laundry and handle all the up keep plus the extra crap no problem.

The thing is, normally, I could.

I can't wait until I am not pregnant anymore... this house is a mess and I feel stuck with it. My husband is irritated with it, I'm ready to scream about it... and the animals just seem to run the place however they choose.

3:56 p.m.

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