Monday, September 10, 2012

I said Get on With It.

My frustrations continue... though, thankfully not to the point they were on Monday. No, I would have blown a gasket by now if that was the case.
Nevertheless... it is never easy though. Yesterday, my mother got up (though later than she had said) and made her way out of the house around 10 something to catch the bus. And when she reached her transfer point, I of course received a call that went something like "well, as my bus gets here the bus I need pulls out, that's just fucking great...." Complete with 3 year old temper tantrum like sighs and sounds....... (she has to wait about an hour for the bus she needs to come back around.)
Thankfully, that was really the extent of yesterday's stress. She got home almost without incident.
This morning however... just went odd. At 7:30 she signs on (yes, she is in the basement apartment, we still talk to each other over instant messenger...) and asks me: "the bus gets to the bus stop at 8:40, right?" My reply, after checking the schedule I printed for her... "yep......"
An hour later.... she says: "I don't think I am going to make it to this bus..." - and then she proceeds to tell me how her knees are bothering her, and she has been up since 7:10 but she is just "moving slowly" and on and on... and meanwhile, in my mind I am screaming HOW ASSININE CAN YOU BE? You have been HANDED a job, on a silver FREAKING platter, that will LET you pull this sort of "hours as you want" crap BUT - you have worked not even a total of what... 12 hours!?! You think you can just take the luxury of "moving slowly" - Just.... good GRIEF!
So... a little bit later, I think around 9, I hear her coming up the stairs.. I think good, she will catch the 9:40 bus, and once again call me to complain because yesterday I told her that she HAD to catch the 8:40 bus otherwise her connection would take an hour again... but whatever... at least she is going...
And she comes up the stairs... already clearly semi ready to go - and says "I can't do this today...."
Me: Dumbfounded expression, with a "Huh?" For good measure.
Her: "I can't do this today... my knees, and the walk to the bus stop, and I just..... can't....."
Me: Stunned silence.
Her: Stomped back downstairs muttering something. (After not getting an "It's ok, you don't have to work today..." out of me. - Or that is my assumption.)
Now, who the hell crowned me warden? Isn't this just common sense? Yeah, I sympathize very much... her legs hurt. I get it. I truly do. But this job has been HANDED to her. Forget for a second she told me before coming here, she would immediately go to the place she used to work when she was here briefly when I was pregnant with my daughter, who she left on good terms and right away have a job... forget for a second she SAID if that didn't work out, she would right away go to the car dealership here, in the Franchise of the one she was leaving "in good terms" there, and get a job.... that she has not even attempted ANY of this - and stick to the shear fact that she has been here over 6 weeks, and still has no job, has contributed maybe $40, and has now lost her car... her ability to GO on job interviews... what the hell is she thinking? If *I* were her... I would be doing MORE than everything in my power to hold onto that job.
Geeze. Within a few moments of stomping back downstairs, she stomped back UP the stairs, "grandly" opened the door, said good bye to my munchkins, (not me) and proceeded to leave. I was able to stop her briefly, asking "your going?" (I have a knack for the obvious, I know...) and with a huff, she said yes, something about hurting and "if" she makes it... and left... shutting the door quite hard.
Why the hell is this being taken out ON me? (I will give it another day or so, then be able to officially tag it a "pattern" and I WILL call her on it... I don't need this shit...)
As predicted... she called me once she got to the office, complaining yet again about the long transfer.
Like I said.. I will give all the damn complaining another day or so... say if it is still happening on Friday... Monday I will tell her just how much I do NOT want to hear it... and frankly tell her how much she should be THANKFUL... rather than full of complaints.
So... aside from that, my day really isn't going so badly. Stress is my middle name... but not for long... one way or another.

Edited: 1:06pm: Below (In the "heard in my house" spot) I was all excited to go exercise right? Well.. screw that too - compliments of my brother. Who, after being up here to shower, KNOWING the kids were sleeping, KNOWING I was going to be busy, decided to come BACK up the stairs KNOWING the dogs have a fit wanting to be pet by him to help himself to some of MY bottled water. Of course, my daughter woke up. I am so damn mad. They have NO consideration, NO acceptance of what's MINE and what's THEIRS, just take, take, take, take, take - and what the hell? No common sense either.. HELLOOO, KIDS ARE SLEEPING ASSHOLE.
Sometimes the way my family behaves worries me... terrifies me. Is that what I am? Was I born to be that way? How did I escape it? HAVE I escaped it? I say please and thank you... I feel shame in asking for help when I should be able to help myself... I say "bless you" when someone sneezes, and I don't take anyone for granted. How can I be so opposite? Am I? Or am I fooling myself?

12:38 p.m.

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