Sometimes I really feel like my moods can be completely unfair to my husband. Just a little while ago, as both our children napped he was stretched out on the couch, and invited me to join him. And I was completely hesitant because I *knew* where he wanted it to lead. And... I just didn't. Sure I have my reasons... or excuses, depending on your view of it - but I just was not up for it.
**Begin whine here... - I am exhausted, I feel like I have not caught up with my energy from Christmas being over yet, my hip has been hurting VERY badly the past couple of days and aside from bothering me, it is getting me quite irritated because I don't know WHY it's been hurting more... and I am just plain stressed.. and sleepy - and recently when I have been sleepy I have noticed I have been damn irritable... and no one is to blame for that but myself. - End of whine session...**
So, laying there so comfortably beside him, I found myself completely distracted... the room was blaring bright... the TV station was still showing Winnie The Pooh and the volume seemed excessively loud... and then my hip began to cramp.
Needless to say it was a failed attempt by my husband to take advantage of a moment that I should have jumped on. I just *need* more sleep. And the future only holds less sleep... when my husband goes back to work my days will only become more hectic.
I am hoping it will be a good hectic though, because I will finally be able to get us back on some sort of schedule again... get our lives in "order" because right now things seem to be heavily in a state of disarray.
I just feel bad... there was an opportunity for a nice, close moment with my husband, completely missed. Now he is snoring away on the couch, and I hear my daughter has awakened upstairs.
Maybe I can find a way to make the sleep I *do* get more restful?