Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Tornado Filled Dreams...

I had the most vivid dream last night.
It started out with us living in the new house already... (3 more precious weeks, as I count the seconds...)
And some things were off, with the way the front of the house is set up, but I can rationalize that to the fact that we don't actually LIVE there yet, so it is not deeply planted into my subconscious. Anyway... I was standing in front of the house, looking over the fence towards the back yard, and there were the most awesome clouds... lumpy and a little green (just like they were right as the tornado barreled into my house when I was 12, in Texas...) and one started getting lower, and lower to the ground. I knew what was coming, but I could NOT take my eyes off it. I had my Jillian with me - but I KNEW we were safe. Even if tornados form on Long Island, they are very weak. So we watched it. Descend to the ground, and start to rotate.
All of this was happening in my back yard by the way - which for the dream, was probably about 5 acres of land. (Bummer, in reality it is only about 1/3rd of an acre - at least that's and upgrade from the .21 acre I am on now.)
So, finally I pried my eyes off the very well formed tornado long enough to go inside and get my husband, to tell him he HAS to see this. It is once in a lifetime up here... he comes out, HOLDING my son... and we all stand there in awe at the tornado. (Another reality check, it would have been way too close to stand and watch, and with the babies, we would have been in the basement!)
For some reason I walked away from everyone - a bit closer to the fence... and it started getting closer. And closer. So I got down where the fence would shield me, and started to crawl back to the front door, where the family was calling to me to hurry. JUST as I got up against the wall of the house, the tornado came through RIGHT where I had JUST crawled past. It meandered in front of the house for a bit... and went on it's way.
I don't know where the dream would have gone from here... the dogs awakened me with their daily early morning need to pee.
What sort of a dream metaphor is an intense tornado like that supposed to be?
I mean, clearly my life feels way too far out of my control these days - but don't things like that actually mean the reverse in dreams? I don't know... I read that somewhere.
So.. I just thought I would share that this morning. I need to find time to sit down and update more on my blogs right now. It is always therapeutic for me to write. And I am behind on EVERYTHING. My baby girl getting her ears pierced, her SCHOOL (YES - I said SCHOOL!!) and there is just SO much else I want to say. But with everything, plus all the ebay stuff I am trying to get sold for my husband, and I am just in the very beginning of trying to pack and organize us for the move... I feel ready to scream!
I want a break. A nice long break, and a vacation!  

Ok, I am going to TRY to elaborate! After the first night of my workshop, when I came home, my baby girl came RUNNING up to me just SO excited. Now, my husband had sent me a picture of her - but there was a trick of the light, and it almost looked like she had a big goose egg on her forehead, and a scratch down her cheek. So I had come RUSHING home right after we were done. And I walk in, and she comes running up all excited. I was confused. Then she showed me her ears! Her Daddy had taken her to get them pierced while I was gone!
THAT is what the picture had been showing me - but I didn't even see that!! (There was no bump or scratch on her head, it had been a trick of the light.) I was so happy and excited for her - but at first, I was also a little bummed. My baby girl had her ears pierced... and I was not there to hold her hand. BUT - on the upside, I got to miss the crying. That my husband swore was minimal.
Ok, what else am I behind on? My baby girl is about to start a pre-Kindergarten class in a private school. I am really hoping it will help her. And it will help us know how "different" she may be from all the other kids her age. We talked openly with the staff about our concerns, and their ways of handling it made us very comfortable. IF all goes well, she will start the 31st. My BABY - in SCHOOL. Yes... I am already holding back the water-works. We may have to delay her start date by a week or 2 with all the confusion we are dealing with for our move... but I really hope not - I have myself all emotionally armored up... I don't NEED to drag this out. Because I know she will do great - *I* will be the one with the issues!!! But I know how good for her it will be... so, that morning I will just put a "perma-smile" on for her sake.. and go for it!
Anyway - then there is our upcoming move. I feel so unprepared. I have been stalling with packing - I know it is not like it is a major across the country thing this time, it is just a town East of here. I am excited beyond words, and I WANT to just be THERE. This week I will start the packing process... I am REALLY looking forward to it.

10:41 a.m.

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