I just think that describes it perfectly for me. All this build up of energy and anticipation, all for this past weekend... and everything went great - as good as it possibly could have given our hard circumstances these days... and now I am sort of left with this.. "ok, now what?" feeling...
I just want to hit "pause." And hold things like they are for a bit. The house looks so nice with all the decorations up - and the kids just adore the tree (though they drive me crazy poking at it too) and then there are the more obvious reasons... I am terrified to look forward right now. On Christmas Day we learned the impossible to accept news about my mother-in-law. That she may just have to stay in the hospital at this point. She is so weak now - things have just deteriorated so much faster than any of us saw coming. Even if she gets to go home, it would only be to a home hospice sort of thing, where one of us would constantly have to be there, along with a nurse. I just can't believe this. Just a month ago she sat here at my table for Thanksgiving... she was not feeling well... but she was 'ok' - but I guess she really wasn't. Looks can be deceiving.
Ok, I am going to try to switch to the good aspects of the weekend, because there were plenty. I had very short notice to get my poor house in order for everyone to come over on Christmas Eve... but somehow I pulled it off, even cooking the dinner instead of ordering out! I think everyone genuinely liked it, and was happy to be here... (given the circumstance) I got some great pictures (which I will post at the bottom!) My only complaint about this weekend... we never got to go look at Christmas lights at night with the kids. So we probably won't this year, because my husband gets home so late during the week... but other than that... everything went good.
Christmas morning I came out before the munchkins and made breakfast (I tried something new, wrapped ham and cheese up in crescent rolls and baked them, they turned out great!) and the kids came running out to find a HUGE pile of presents under the tree! Seeing everything laid out the night before, I was very proud of myself. I had no idea I had accumulated that much for them! (Note to self, make it a point EVERY YEAR to start accumulating stuff around Halloween!) The smiles on their faces were just amazing. And, yes, my husband did come through very well for me. He gave me this adorable little thing, that is a big couch, (made of resin, or clay) and it has all of us on it represented by cute little bears! It also has 2 cats, and both dogs (even the right breeds!) and all of our names. So... now it is sitting where it fits perfectly, the small extra shelf on the computer desk! He also gave me my favorite (and only) perfume (Cinnabar) and the Lost DVD set! (Bonus features.. I can't wait to watch it!) And I think (hope) he was very happy with everything I gave him!
That night everyone came back over and had the Turkey I had made. That was not planned, I was going to just do it for us... but it felt like we should all just be together right now. And I think it was good... plus it seemed a little more relaxed, probably because we were not all worried about time constraints. (On Christmas Eve my husband's brother had to get his daughter back for her mom, and my step-daughter had to be back at a certain time too.)
I know I am probably leaving out so much... but for now, I will let the pictures speak for themselves. (As always, click on one to get to it's description, and to see it larger.) They are in order from Christmas Eve (and just before) to Christmas Day.